Wednesday, 7:18 PM

Dear Friend,

I’ve been thinking about seeing a psychologist.

I don’t have any mental problems… that I’m aware of.

It’s just that I have nobody to talk with.

Nobody.

Sure, I’ve got some really good friends… but the conversations are always about them.

See, I realized a long time ago that nobody gives a damn about what I think, feel or believe.

Well, that’s not exactly true.

It’s not that they don’t care… it’s just that they have their own problems to deal with. And I don’t feel good about dumping my problems on them, too.

So I try to spend about 95% of my time talking about what they want to talk about.

Whenever I accidentally start to talk about me, I remind myself that nobody wants to hear it… and I get back on the topic of them.

With one of the friends I regular speak with, I’m lucky to even get a word in edge-wise. Even if I could talk, he wouldn’t even hear it… because he never shuts up.

So I never really get a chance to talk with anybody about what’s on my mind.

Plus, none of my friends would even even understand most of my problems and concerns. They just don’t operate in the same world I do. Even if I wanted to share that stuff, they just wouldn’t understand.

Gary Halbert understood.

It was always nice to know he was just a phone call away… and even if he didn’t have any solutions for me… at least he understood.

But last I checked, unless somebody constructed a long distance phone line to copywriter heaven, that’s not an option any longer.

So THAT is why I’m willing to pay a shrink $200 an hour… just to have someone listen to me.

I’ll be the first to admit… I somewhat of a cheapskate. I don’t really want to spend money on a psychologist.

So I MIGHT have figured out a way to save myself that $200 an hour … and maybe help YOU in the process, too.

Here’s What This Is All About:

I just got Ben Settle’s newest product, The Street Smart E-mail System.

It totally kicks “boo-tay” for making money with an e-mail list.

I’m already testing a couple things he recommends and they’re already (just within the past 3 days) starting to bring in a lot more sales. I think it might even DOUBLE the sales I’ve been getting from e-mail marketing.

Anyhoo… one of the things Ben recommends is sending out e-mails every day. Not long articles like I’ve been writing on the blog lately, but short 300 to 500 word articles… with the entire article sent by e-mail.

I’ve noticed something about this:

First of all, Ben seems to have a VERY high open rate and readership.

Secondly, he also posts every article on his blog every day.

And Google LOVES that.

In fact, he gets a nice amount of traffic and new subscribers every day because of his Google ranking.

And all that traffic and new subscribers from Google is…

100% Free!

I like THAT. (Remember the cheapskate thing.)

So here’s what I’m thinking…

I think I’m going to test writing more frequent messages for my DobermanDan.com subscribers.

I’ll keep them relatively brief and send them out by e-mail.

I’ll also post them on the blog.

Here’s what I hope to accomplish:

1. Writing my Doberman Dan newsletter is therapeutic. It makes me feel like SOMEBODY is listening to me… even if you’re not.  So I hope this will take the place of that $200/hour shrink I was thinking about renting once a week.

2. I’m going to do my best to bring value to your life with these more frequent messages. Hopefully you’ll learn some valuable stuff that will enrich your life, make you more money… or both. Even if every single message isn’t life-changing, at the very least I hope you’ll be entertained a little.

3. I’m hoping the more frequent content on DobermanDan.com will make me more popular with Google. I sincerely want to build my subscriber base… it’s just that it would be nice to do that without paying for it. (See “cheapskate” referenced twice above.)

So that’s the plan.

I’m saying “more frequent” messages right now because I’m not sure I want to commit to a daily message.

We’ll see.

For now I’m thinking it will be about 3 times a week.

We’ll see how that goes and what kind of feedback I get. If it’s good, maybe I’ll consider going to a 5 message a week plan like Ben.

Anyhoo… if all goes as planned… THANK YOU for saving me $800 a month on that shrink.

I owe you a lunch or something.

All the best,

Tuesday, 12:13 AM

Dear Friend,

Not sure if you noticed but I’ve been AWOL from the blog for a while.

I’ll explain why in just a minute.

But first, I’d like to have a little chat with you.

See, I could really use your help with a problem.

It’s been bothering me for a while… and I would really like an honest answer.

Oh, wait a second. I forgot a quick item of business I need to cover first.

I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news…

You Can’t Hire Me Anymore!

Well, it’s not IMPOSSIBLE to hire me… but the pool of potential clients who would meet my new stringent qualifications is infinitesimally small.

As I’ve mentioned in the blog, I mostly do my own projects… but occasionally I like to do some client work, too.

I took a couple clients last year and the early part of this year. They were all great people and I’m glad to know them.

And even though I’ve been at this a while, this old dog learned some new tricks on how to successfully work with clients.

You may be expecting me to transition into my “clients suck” tirade… but that definitely is NOT the case with these guys.

ALL of them are salt of the earth people. I love them and would like to have their babies… if I had the plumbing for it.

And no, I didn’t just get lucky in the “copywriting client lottery”. They were carefully screened before I agreed to take the gig. THAT’S why it was a pleasure working with them. (Freelancers, take note.)

Same thing with the guys in my 8-week “Kitchen Table Business” coaching program earlier this year… and the guys in my Inner Circle.

All winners, go-getters and true “gems”. It’s an honor to work with them.

Anyhoo… my recent client experiences reinforced several things in my slightly demented brain:

1. Client work can be fun and exciting… when you work with the RIGHT clients.

2. They will never do EVERYTHING you tell them to do… regardless of your track record of success. (This is normal. Don’t get mad at them… just put your persuasion skills to use and get them to think what you told them to do was THEIR idea. THEN they’ll do it.)

    

3. An experienced copywriter/entrepreneur/marketer with a proven track record is worth a literal FORTUNE to the right client.

After seeing the results my clients were getting, I finally realized…

I’m Not Charging Enough!

I used to charge $15,000 to write a sales letter and usually some kind of royalty based on performance.

I’ll never forget the first time I quoted that price. I was glad I did it on a phone with a mute button… otherwise the client would have heard me snickering nervously while cringing.

It was wayyyy outside my comfort zone. It seemed like a king’s ransom at the time.

Now I realize when I work with the right client, compared to his return on investment, $15k is chump change.

It’s actually a disservice to your client to charge too little.  It leaves him with a low perceived value about what you bring to the table… and compliance is much lower, too. (Again… freelancers, take note.)

So now, for me to even consider taking a client, my fee is a MINIMUM of $25,000 plus some kind of back end royalty based on performance.

I’m also somewhat sad to say I can no longer afford to work with start-ups. If you want to work with me, you need to have a business already doing a MINIMUM of $500,000/year in sales.

See, if I want to work with a start-up, I’ll do it myself. It’s MUCH easier, I can get things going MUCH faster… and it’s INFINITELY more profitable.

That is why it’s highly unlikely, even if you meet the qualifications, I’ll accept you as a client.

It’s just simple economics. I can make 100 to 10,000 times more money doing what I do for myself than doing it for most clients.

Which leads me to something I’ve been wanting to discuss with you for a while now.

I need your help with a problem that has been quite vexing for me.

And I’d like to get your opinion about it. But in order for me to do that…

We Need To Have An Adult Conversation…

I need to be totally transparent with you about some thoughts and fears I’m dealing with… and that is extremely “non guru”.

The guru is the perfect guy on the pedestal… and to STAY on the pedestal, the guru needs to perpetuate that myth.

But I’m going to do the exact opposite and share the kind of problems gurus aren’t supposed to have… and DEFINITELY aren’t supposed to let anybody see.

Before I personally mentored with him, Gary Halbert was the guru on the pedestal for me.

He could walk on water, turn water into wine and everything he touched turned to gold… or so I thought.

After I got to know him, I discovered he was just as screwed up as the rest of us. And even though he was “the greatest copywriter in the world” he still had his fair share of flops and failures.

So today, instead of playing the role of the perfect guru like I’m SUPPOSED to do, I’m going to open up about some stuff I’ve been worried about.

I hope that doesn’t hurt your opinion of me… and I hope you don’t discard the message because you discovered the messenger isn’t perfect.

To properly explain this problem, I’m going to reveal some stuff you’ll probably NEVER hear from any guru.

I don’t mean to offend anybody or hurt anybody’s business… but in order for you to understand some things, I have to pull back the curtain and reveal some stuff nobody has been willing to tell you… up until now.

Sure, this stuff is talked about behind closed doors… but disclosing it to the “herd” has been expressly prohibited.

In fact, by simply hitting the WordPress “publish” button a few minutes ago…

I May Have Just Committed Career Suicide!

Whatever.

I’ll survive.

See, I don’t make my living as a guru. I really DO what I’m teaching… and THAT is how I support my bad habits of eating regularly and sleeping indoors.

So, in spite of the backlash I’ll probably get for this, I’m going to talk about some stuff I’m not supposed to talk about.

Enough set-up. Let’s get into this…

Remember when I got the million dollar buyout offer on one of my businesses?

I was kinda excited about that.

My plan was to spend a few months goofing off and then turn DobermanDan.com into a REAL business selling info products about direct response marketing.

But I turned down the offer… and this blog has stayed a side project that makes almost no money.

After having time to think about it, I believe accepting that offer would have been a big mistake… for a couple reasons.

First of all, I recently started focusing on that business a lot more. (The economy has FORCED me to.) At John Carlton’s suggestion, I hired a really good assistant marketer/copywriter to help me take it to the next level.

So far, things are really looking up.

In fact, if everything keeps up like this, that $1 million dollar offer will look like chump change.

So that’s one reason I’m glad I didn’t sell the business.

Secondly, if I had sold the business and jumped into the guru biz full time, I would be just like so many other gurus… teaching stuff that was only successful in my distant memory.

Stepping up my involvement in my business recently has really forced me to dig, test and discover what’s working RIGHT NOW!

There’s no room for error or “throwing mud up against the wall”.

Every penny invested has to be accountable and trackable. And if it doesn’t return an acceptable ROI, that stuff has to be scrapped and the money applied to something that IS bringing in an acceptable ROI.

We live in a different world now, with a MUCH different economy than just a few short years ago. You can’t just coast along with half-assed marketing and make money like you could before.

You really have to be on top of your marketing game to prosper in today’s economy.

The principles of human nature and direct response selling never really change… but some techniques and delivery methods DO.

In my most humble (but accurate) opinion, if you want to be a good teacher, you have to actually be in the game… actively operating a business, testing new ideas, developing new products, testing new media, etc.

If you’re not in the game, you’re teaching based on theory… and you’re misleading your students.

No matter how much I COULD make in the guru biz full time… I simply couldn’t sleep at night if I thought I was misleading my students.

And trust me… there is a LOT of money to be made in the guru biz.

I’m not talking about a measly $50k or $100k a month. I’m talking about…

Tens Of MILLIONS Of Fungolas A Year!

How do I know that?

When I thought I was going to sell my business, I started figuring out my next step. I started studying successful people in the guru biz… and picking the brains of some very well known gurus.

And I discovered some very interesting trade secrets.

So today, without further adieu… I’m going to reveal…

(Drum roll, please)…

The formula for making the big bucks as a guru!

Step #1 For Making Millions As A Guru…

Hang Out Your “Guru Shingle” On The Internet

That’s it.

You don’t even have to have successfully done what you’re teaching. (Just like most college professors.)

You think I’m kidding?

I’m as serious as a heart attack.

Heck, I even worked with one of these guys for a brief period.

He was a completely raw, wet behind the ears rookie back then.

He did have some talent for writing… but as far as writing copy that could produce results, he was a completely unproven entity.

Yes, he did mentor under a well known copywriting guru for a couple months… but nothing he wrote was ever run or tested.

He had never run a direct response business nor had ever worked for a direct response business.

He had no experience whatsoever in the direct response business. It just appeared that he might be able to write some copy that MIGHT work if he kept at it.

So guess what this newbie did after just a couple months of learning the THEORY of direct response copywriting without having any real world experience… or any proof whatsoever that he could write response-pulling copy?

He put up a website claiming he was one of the best copywriters in the world!

And even more amazingly… he started getting clients paying him 5-figures to write copy for them.

After his mentor discovered this guy’s website, he called me in a rage and said, “Dan, so-and-so is a FRAUD! And I’m going to expose him.”

I convinced his mentor that it would be a mistake to expose him. He should just let karma take care of everything.

Even though this guy initially misled people about his skill level and experience, he got good at writing copy. And he got good FAST.

I guess he HAD to after jumping into the deep end of the pool while still just in the beginner swim class.

So he lied about his experience level, misled people, took their money for copywriting assignments when he had almost ZERO real world experience… and according to his mentor, a rather famous guru, he even misquoted him in a testimonial on his website.

That was enough to get him some clients paying him a decent chunk of change to write copy for them.

But when he REALLY started making the big money was when he started promoting himself as a full fledged guru… and selling high priced information products, coaching groups, master mind groups, etc.

So that’s step #1. You don’t have to be an expert at all… just CLAIM you’re one and start promoting yourself.

Let’s move on to…

Step #2:

Create A Larger Than Life Persona

God knows you can’t just be YOURSELF!

Nooooooo! That’s not good enough.

You have to be that perfect “guru on a pedestal” we talked about earlier.

You have to be better than the rest of us mere mortals.

You have to make people envy your “rock star” lifestyle, filled with non-stop fun and excitement… even if it’s not true.

You’re perfect. You never fail and everything you touch turns to gold.

Every business you start, every website you create, every sales letter you write is a raging success… sucking in money “like a vacuum cleaner on steroids!!!” (Extra exclamation points added… just like on their website copy.)

And you have to give the appearance of being richer than Midas… even if you’re broke and up to your eyeballs in debt.

Also, you can’t just be “Richard Cranium, Internet Marketing Expert.”

No, that won’t build you a huge cult-like following of Kool Aid-drinking sycophants.

You have to create a unique persona, like “Richard Cranium, the lazy, works-only-one-hour-a-month, skateboarding, kazoo-playing, hippie guru.”

Then do videos of you riding your skateboard, smoking trees and playing the kazoo at the beach all day, completely care-free… while your business “makes MILLIONS every month… totally on auto pilot!”

Post videos with you driving your Ferrari to the Playboy mansion to hang out with Hef and a bevvy of big breasted bikini-clad bimbos.

And don’t forget… you need to build the dream for your starry-eyed followers so they’ll believe they can get rich overnight, too:

“It was just two years ago I was a broke, shoeless, homeless loser, living on the beach and sleeping on my only possession… a surfboard… until I discovered the secrets to becoming an overnight millionaire on the Internet. Now I’m getting laid by super-models on my own private luxury jet… yadda yadda yadda…”

Uh huh.

My sources show the guy had a successful white collar job making 6-figures a year before going into the “how to make money”/Internet Marketing guru thing.

I’m not sure you can call living in a $850,000 dollar house in Florida “being homeless”… but… it MUST be true because there’s one thing I’m SURE of…

A guru wouldn’t lie!

Moving on.

Step #3:

Create “BSO” Products

Remember those three-eyed little green aliens in the movie Toy Story?

They were fascinated with “the claw”.

They thought it was some kind of magical entity that was going to rescue them and carry them away to freedom.

They pointed to it and spoke its name in quiet reverence…

“The claaawwww!”

That’s EXACTLY what you need as a guru… a fan base with the same fascination and reverence for your products as those little three-eyed green guys had for the claw.

A list of Kool Aid drinkers that believe your products are going to magically rescue them from being broke and miserable… without having to put in any real work.

Selling plain old fashioned direct marketing products will NOT get that kind of response.

You have to create what I call BSO’s…

Bright Shiny Objects

They have to be BETTER and more exciting than regular old marketing products.

You have to give them sexy names like Massive Mind Control Conversions… or Prospect Pipeline Power. (It HAS to be good if you use alliteration in the title, right?)

And here’s the good news…

They’re easy to create because the content can be 100% complete B.S.!

They don’t have to work. They just need to appear to be new, sexy and cutting edge.

Your products can’t be about the tried and true direct marketing principles that haven’t changed (and never will change) since Aaron Montgomery Ward mailed the first mail order catalog in 1872.

No, that’s just not sexy enough.

Never mind that these principles are the keys to big success in direct response marketing… AND it’s what your customers truly need to succeed.

It’s not what they WANT.

And that’s good news to many of the young IM gurus because…

They Don’t Know The Principles
Of Successful Direct Response Marketing!

If the truth be told, they couldn’t teach successful direct response principles or create a product about them if their lives depended on it.

They’ve never studied the old time masters like John Caples… Claude Hopkins… John E. Kennedy… George Haylings… Robert Collier… Thomas Hall … Gary Halbert… Gene Schwartz… Joe Sugarman… Ted Nicholas… all the old direct response and mail order guys.

They’ve learned from other young IM gurus who were only successful during a booming economy… who also don’t know the timeless principles of successful direct response marketing.

We’re seeing many of them drop like flies lately because they’re completely clueless about how to prosper in a recession.

But, hey… it’s OK. That’s not the stuff you can sell for $1,999 or $2,497.

It’s too basic… too non-sexy… not bright and shiny enough.

The BSO products that sell for big bucks are…

… A new way to “trick” Google into sending more traffic….

… “Black hat” techniques that bring quick riches without the hassle of learning how to market properly…

… A cutting edge method that tricks thousands of people into your “pipeline”… opting them into lists they have no interest in… and aren’t even aware they’re being opted into.

… Secret new systems that take all those unqualified prospects you tricked into joining your “pipeline”… and somehow magically convert them into paying customers…

… And a host of other BSO’s filled with B.S. content, ad nauseum…

Most of the people buying these BSO’s are newbies… and what they REALLY need is information about the principles of direct response marketing… online and OFFLINE.

But that’s not sexy enough… and it’s hard to get $1,999 or $2,497 selling what REALLY works.

I’m quite skilled at some offline marketing techniques that I’ve used to DOUBLE the sales of online businesses… in less than 60 days.

This stuff works like gangbusters… and most Internet marketers are leaving a LOT of money on the table month after month by not using this offline stuff.

Almost NOBODY is teaching it or offering products that teach it, either.

I mentioned this to Perry Marshall, the Google Adwords guru, at the System Seminar a few years ago. I told him there’s a gap in the marketplace and it’s a sin nobody in the IM crowd is teaching this stuff.

Perry said, “You’re right, Dan. That stuff is exactly what people in this niche NEED to make a lot of money. But it’s not what they WANT.”

What they want, of course, is the BSO.

And if you want to make a lot of money as a guru, that’s what you have to sell.

Sooooo… once you’ve created your BSO, you need to move on to…

Step #4:

Do WHATEVER It Takes
To Get Into The IMGOBC

You know what the IMGOBC is, don’t-cha?

Probably not ‘cuz I just made it up.

It’s the Internet Marketing Good Ole Boys Club!

I should clarify something. I only made up the name… the group really does exist.

It’s an elite little clique… and membership is NOT open to just anybody.

If you can get in with them… you’ll have joint venture opportunities that will make you a small fortune! (Before refunds, of course.)

These guys have huge lists of insanely rabid followers… and their “herd” is accustomed to shelling out 4 and 5-figures for BSO products.

The customers don’t usually have a good track record of implementation… but they DO have a great track record of buying expensive BSO products.

Make no mistake… these guys control the “Cadillac” of lists for BSO products.

The IMGOBC is the coveted “inner circle”… you’ve truly arrived when you’re accepted into the fold.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news… but chances are you’ll NEVER get into the IMGOBC or have the opportunity to joint venture with them.

First of all, it’s a pretty closed deal. You have to know somebody to even be considered.

And secondly, you also have to have your own huge list of rabid Kool Aid-drinking followers so you can reciprocate when you do joint ventures.

See, when the IMGOBC members mail your offer to their lists… you have to reciprocate at a later date by mailing THEIR offers to your list.

So if 20 guys mail your offer to their lists… you have to mail 20 different offers to YOUR list… usually multiple times.

And if you’ve ever been on their lists… the marketing incest just gets out of hand.

You’re getting the same offers 10 different times from 20 different gurus… all promoting the same stuff.

It’s enough to make your head explode! (Or unsubscribe from their lists.)

By the way… have you noticed that when these guys launch a brand new “Super Duper Traffic Generation Secrets On Steroids” BSO course… they always sell it exclusively through joint ventures?

Am I the only person who finds the irony and humor in that?

Anyhoo… this incestuous little group also holds the key to you getting invited to speak and pitch your BSO’s at the biggest IM seminars in the country.

And THAT is one of the fastest secrets to wealth and fame as a guru.

Again… am I the only hombre to find the irony in that?

A guru selling products that claim you can make a fortune on the Internet while sitting at home drinking beer in your skivvies is on the road pitching his products at seminars 30 to 40 weeks out of the year.

Nobody else has picked up on that?

Anyhoo… yours truly will probably never be invited into the IMGOBC.

If I ever had the chance of getting in with them, I blew it the minute I hit the “publish” button on this post.

And I think I’m OK with that.

In fact, it may be a GOOD thing. Only time will tell.

We already started segueing into this earlier so let’s list our next step to making serious bank as a guru…

Step #5:

Pitch Your BSO Products From The Stage
At All The Big Internet Marketing Seminars

Need I say anything more about this step that wasn’t already covered?

There are several other steps I could add… but I think that’s enough for now.

Look… if you’ve got the stomach for it, you can make a LOT of money in the guru business with just these 5 steps.

I do NOT have the stomach for it. And that brings me to the problem that’s been bothering me.

You see, I’ve gained a lot of valuable entrepreneurial experience over the past 20 years or so.

And I’ve arrived at a point in my life where I’d like to start sharing that experience with people serious about improving their lives and making more money without sacrificing an enjoyable lifestyle.

So I would like to transition into making myself available for more teaching… and providing products about direct response and online marketing, coaching programs and possibly seminars.

But I refuse to play the guru game as I just described to you.

So before I move forward and invest any more time and money in this…

I’d Like To Know What YOU Think:

1. Do you think it’s possible to sell marketing products with REAL value without all the BSO hype and B.S. normally required to sell guru-type products?

    

2. Do you think people will pay for non-sexy solutions for building a direct response/online business and making more money… tried & true honest stuff that REALLY works… but requires some study and (gasp!) work?

    

3. Or does the majority really prefer to be lied to and deluded and sold the B.S. “make more money than God only working 3 hours a week” type products?

    

4. Would people buy a marketing product showing them how to DOUBLE their business within 90 days… even if it had nothing to do with the Internet, e-mail, PPC or whatever the newest BSO “technique du jour” is currently promoted by the IMGOBC?

    

5. Can an honest guy with a long track record of success be successful in this business by selling non-hypey, non B.S. products, services, coaching programs, etc. – without all the typical IM guru hype and B.S.?

I would really appreciate your honest opinion.

Thanks for reading this rather long post and giving me the opportunity to rant a while. It was therapeutic for me.

I look forward to reading your comments.

All the best,

Monday, 11:16 AM

Dear Friend,

Did you know there’s a little known search engine with abso-frickin-tutely HOOOOYUGE amounts of traffic?

As a matter of fact, it has so many daily searches, it almost rivals the 800 lb. gorilla, Google.

It’s true!

And it ain’t Yahoo, Bing, Ask.com (does anybody even use that anymore?)… or any other traditional search engine.

In fact, in an official presentation to their richest, cigar chomping, top hat wearing, Monopoly game guy-looking, fat cat investors… it was ceremoniously disclosed they process upwards of 2 B-B-B-BILLION searches per month!

And that, according to reliable estimates (since Google keeps their exact numbers a secret)… would make it…

The 2nd Largest Search Engine In The World!

And it gets even BETTER…

Most of the people on this search engine aren’t just freeloading losers living in their mothers’ basements looking for free stuff.

Nope.

They specifically use this search engine in their insatiable quest to actually BUY something.

So to recap (and REALLY get your greed glands working overtime)…

1. It’s the 2nd largest search engine in the world… (Some days upwards of 60 million searches a day!)

 

2. Most of the searchers are actually looking to BUY something…

    

3. If you know how to work the system… you can get a much cheaper cost per conversion than Google Adwords.

Look, if you’re not using this search engine, you’re really missing out on a big, never-ending, constantly renewing, evergreen source of new customers.

Sounds good, huh?

I bet I’ve got you really curious and practically begging me to reveal this search engine/customer acquisition secret, right?

Well, if I were a typical guru, it would be about this point where I’d start my month-long series of sales pitches building up to the launch of my new $2,000+ course.

Don’t get me wrong… I COULD create an entire course on profiting from this secret search engine.

I’m definitely considered an expert. I’ve been using it since July 15, 1998.

By the way… an interesting bit of Doberman Dan trivia:

Many of the current “guru du jours” were still in elementary school getting wedgies and mercilessly beaten in dodge ball back in 1998.

But I already had a decade of kitchen table entrepreneurial experience under my belt, had been making money in self publishing and mail order for several years… and making money ONLINE for 2 years back in ’98.

If you were selling stuff online back in 1996, you were definitely considered a pioneer.

But I don’t go around beating my chest about what an Internet Marketing pioneer I was.

The truth is… I was practically clueless about it at the time.

I just took what was already working for me in mail order and applied it to this new media called the “Internet”.

That model worked really well for me back in those pioneer days.

In fact… it still does!

Anyhoo… back to my big search engine secret…

Even though I’ve been an expert in profiting from this special search engine for over a decade… as recently as last week, I learned something totally new that is REALLY going to pay off in a big way…

I discovered how to use video to increase the number of searches I get… and also increase my conversions.

So when is my expensive course coming out?

Are you kidding? I’ve got too much on my plate as it is.

So how about I just reveal it (somewhat reluctantly) for FREE?

Why “somewhat reluctantly”?

Am I having a hard time making my mortgage payment this month and need to sell you something to cover my nut?

Not at all.

I’m doing OK this month, thanks for asking.

Let me explain why I’m “reluctantly” giving this info away… and why I think…

“Free” SUCKS!

It’s quite simple…

Things given away free aren’t valued… and usually aren’t acted upon.

So even though I’m going to reveal a simple and inexpensive customer acquisition secret that can make you a small fortune… most likely you won’t ever do anything with it… because I gave it to you free.

You simply don’t have any skin in the game.

I’m actually doing you a disservice by NOT charging you for it. If you pay for it, you’re much more likely to implement because you’ve got some skin in the game.

So, yes… I realize I’m “casting pearls before swine”… but I’m going to do it anyway.

See, I know in my heart of hearts, there’s SOMEBODY out there who one day is gonna “get it” and become very successful with all these marketing nuggets I reveal in my blog.

Maybe even use them to start a kitchen table business for cheap and finally escape a decades-long, dead end, life draining, soul-sucking slavery known as a J.O.B. (Journey Of the Broke).

It’s THAT hope that motivates me to keep writing this blog.

So even though for your own darn good I SHOULD be charging for it, I’m going to continue to give it away free.

Now let me share my search engine secret with you.

The other day, I was looking for a hard to find music book. I immediately went to my “go to” source… the secret search engine I’ve been talking about where I’ve found numerous priceless treasures…

eBay!

Betcha never considered eBay a search engine, did ya?

Well, with over 2 BILLION searches a month, I’d say it qualifies.

And like I said before, these people are almost all searching to BUY something. THOSE are the kind of searchers I like!

Back to my music book search.

Here’s what usually happens on eBay…

1. I find what I’m looking for and have several (sometimes HUNDREDS) of different sellers I can buy from.

    

2. I find one with a good price and excellent feedback from other buyers.

    

3. I bid on the item or use the “buy it now” button, if the seller made that option available.

    

4. I receive the item, am satisfied with the transaction and promptly forget all about the seller… NEVER considering him for any future purchases.

Instead, for any future related purchases, I start the whole process over again.

And that is pretty common practice for most buyers on eBay.

It’s a “front end” machine. The sellers never try to capture a customer’s info… or do anything to promote further back end sales. They just rely on a (hopefully) never ending parade of new customers just buying on the front end.

Hmmmm… come to think of it, that’s exactly what 90% of business owners do, too.

That’s like busting your butt year after year, mining with a pick axe and shovel, tossing aside huge deposits of gold, silver and diamonds so you can pick up some old copper pennies.

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

But here’s what one smart business owner is doing…

First of all, he recognizes the massive number of people searching on eBay for the items he sells… so he has lots of listings there.

And he’s not charging top dollar.

He’s smart enough to realize that eBay can be a massive customer acquisition media… so he can sell things at break even (or maybe a slight profit) to get new customers “in the funnel.”

Smart, smart, smart.

He also realizes if he doesn’t do something to keep this new customer in his “herd”, all his work will have been for naught. The customer, even though he’s happy with his purchase, will forget all about the eBay seller and will just start the whole eBay search process again when he wants to buy a related product.

Think about it. Can you remember the name or any other details of any sellers you’ve bought stuff from off of eBay?

Probably not.

So here’s what this eBay seller did to keep me in his herd and make sure I come back to him whenever I want to buy more music books and other related products.

He simply stuffed what we call a “bounceback offer” in the box he shipped my product in.

Here’s what it looked like:

This guy is using the first sale on eBay as a way to get a new customer in his “funnel” and direct him to his website for ongoing back end sales.  He offers incentives to go to the website like an ongoing discount, special offers, special orders for hard to find stuff, etc.

Could this bounceback offer be improved?

Sure… but it’s a million times better than NOT sending a bounceback offer, which is what most business do.

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

And it was good enough to get me to bookmark his site and order something else… so this simple bounceback offer did its job.

All this is good stuff… and this business owner get’s a Doberman Dan “gold star” for being a smart marketer… but here’s the the most important and smartest thing that happened as a result of this eBay transaction…

He Got My Snail Mail Address!

And if he’s a REALLY smart marketer, he’s going to start sending me a direct mail pitch, catalog or hard copy newsletter at least monthly.

Yes, Buckwheat… I’m talking about good old fashioned snail mail.

In spite of all the high tech stuff, social media, Web 2.0 (or whatever version we’re supposedly up to now), direct mail is still the most effective way to make back end sales to your existing customers.

And if you’re not making back end sales pitches to your customer list every month with direct mail, you’re choosing to leave about 40% to 50% of your profits on the table.

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…

If you want to make maximum money in minimum time (and who doesn’t?)… capturing e-mails is like mining for those copper pennies… but capturing snail mail addresses is…

Mining For Gold, Silver and Diamonds!

Depending on your auction fees, product costs and conversions, it’s very likely this little eBay secret I shared today could be more cost effective for you than Google Adwords.

Gasp! More cost effective than the great Google Adwords?!

Yeah, it very well could be.

But even if the cost per conversion is the same or even a little more, you could look at it as just another “leg” in your multi-legged marketing table.

The more legs you have, the more stable your business.

If you’ve only got 2 or 3 legs you’re always at risk of falling.

Or the very WORST possible situation… you only have ONE leg (Google).

It’s impossible to have any stability with only one leg.

You may THINK you have a business… but you don’t. You only have a temporary way of making money that could be 100% shut down at any moment.

If I were in that situation, I wouldn’t sleep until I had at least 3 other legs going.

In fact, I COULDN’T sleep if I only had one leg.

Look, I don’t want you to stay awake at night worrying yourself to death because you’re one-legged.

That’s why I shared one of my secrets with you today.

By the end of the day today, you can quickly, easily and inexpensively add another predictable and reliable “leg” to your marketing for more stability.

And sleep better at night.

I sincerely hope you found that helpful.

Pleasant dreams!

All the best,

P.S. I really enjoy writing my blog.

This blog is my way of giving back and sharing all the most profitable lessons I’ve discovered over the years.

I’d continue writing it even if I never made another dime from it.

But it’s pretty cool I do make money from it. I get paid doing something I love!

Would you be interested in that? Making money blogging about a topic you’re excited about?

You don’t even have to be a very good writer. If you can write a simple e-mail, you can make a nice profit from your own blog.

Click here to discover how to start making money from your blog almost immediately.

Tuesday, 4:02 PM

Dear Friend,

They say first impressions are lasting impressions.

If that’s true (and it probably is) you better make a darn good first impression with your prospects.

If not, they just might go elsewhere.

I’d like to share a recent experience I had.

Now technically, this wasn’t my first impression with this company. But it was the first time I’ve communicated with them by phone.

They provide a really cool service… and do a GREAT job at a very low price.

And they’re super fast. In fact “48 Hours” is part of their name. I still can’t believe they do what they do so quickly… literally within 48 hours or less… and are able to do it so cheaply.

I’ve spent a bunch of money with them and will continue to do so.

But check out my first impression of them by phone:

To me, that guy sounds like he’s either pissed off, really tired, bored… or maybe was born without a personality.

He may be great at his job, but he is NOT the guy you should have answering your phone or speaking with customers.

To their credit, the lady I eventually spoke with had a very pleasant phone personality and handled everything just fine.

But if this were my first impression of this company, it wouldn’t be a good one.

Remember my Clients Suck post where I talked about the copy only being a small part of the success of a promotion?

Imagine dropping 50,000 pieces of direct mail only to have the phone answered like this. And when the response is less than stellar you blame it on direct mail.

The problem isn’t direct mail. It got hundreds or thousands of people to call.

The problem was having Mr. Surly answer the phone.

EVERYTHING is marketing!

Disney even considers their janitorial and housekeeping staff as part of their marketing.

Any interaction with a prospect or customer is part of your marketing… and it better be good.

It’s pretty stupid to invest thousands or millions of dollars getting prospects to call you, visit your website, or come into your location… only to hand them off to some apathetic, crusty employee who acts as if it’s an inconvenience and an interruption to deal with them.

Every single employee who has contact with your prospects and customers better know where their bread is buttered. They better understand that because of the customer, they can feed their family and put a roof over their head.

Any employee who doesn’t get that… or has a personality like the guy on this phone recording… should be kept far away from your customer… or fired.

Or go to work as a civil servant.

Only your best and brightest should be allowed to interact with your prospects and customers.

And that’s my most humble (but accurate) opinion.

All the best,

Sunday, 8:29 PM

Dear Friend,

Here’s a followup to the video I posted yesterday, How To Start An Internet Business For Under $200.

Joint ventures are one of the best ways to to get a LOT of traffic and sales quickly… especially if you don’t have any money to invest.

Here’s a tried and true way to gain an audience with a “big dog” and ensure you have the best possible chance to JV with him.

Most of the “big dogs” (the very successful business owners with large lists in your niche) will want to know how your offer is converting before they agree to promote your product to their customers.

If you’ve got a few hundred bucks to invest to see how your offer converts, I suggest using Google Adwords to run some traffic to your site.

If you don’t have any money to invest, then you’re going to have to do some “grunt work” to get some free traffic. I suggest option #1 mentioned on my previous video.

I’ve been using this secret successfully for years and should probably keep it to myself. I don’t want it to lose its effectiveness if everybody starts doing it.

But it’s just too darn good to keep to myself.

So promise me this:

Only use your new-found secret powers I’m giving you for good… never evil, OK?

All the best,

P.S. Click here to download the Word doc I mentioned in the video… and feel free to swipe it for your own use. After all, I swiped it from Gary Halbert!

Saturday, 9:39 PM

Dear Friend,

I’ve often been asked what I would do if I had to start all over again and didn’t have much money.

Well… here’s your answer.

All the best,

Friday, 7:31 PM

Dear Friend,

I’m still having fun and learning a lot with my YouTube 30-Day Challenge.

Today I finally figured out how to use a program called ScreenFlow. I’ve used it before but I only knew about 10% of its functions.

This thing is a POWERHOUSE for creating videos… especially if you need to demonstrate things on the computer.

And if a Luddite like me can figure out how to use it… ANYBODY can.

Enjoy the video!

All the best,

Friday, 10:18 AM

Dear Friend,

Remember when I told you about my new little social media/marketing test in this post?

Well, it has begun.

The idea is to see how much free traffic (and hopefully new DD.com subscribers) I can generate from YouTube.

Right now is an incredibly inconvenient and stressful time in my life to start a new project… but there is never a perfect time to get something new started. There are ALWAYS challenges to deal with. If you wait for the perfect time, you’ll never start anything. You just have to get started regardless of the challenges.

So here’s video#1.

And I’ve already learned something…

I am definitely out of my comfort zone appearing on video. Put a guitar in my hand or let me goof around and be silly and I enjoy it… but this kind of stuff… not so much. In fact, I think that comes across in the video. I look like I’m uncomfortable.

Whatever.

Just like everything else I’ve ever done, I’m just going to put the blinders on and do it. Hopefully I’ll get better as I go along.

Enjoy!

All the best,

P.S. The video quality is very high on the original file. I wonder why it looks so grainy on YouTube?

Monday, 10:05 AM

Dear Friend,

I was reading Terry Dean’s excellent newsletter a few weeks ago and got a great idea for increasing traffic to my blog.

Did you know that YouTube searches now account for 25% of all Google searches?

If I did my math right, that means there are over 22 million searches a DAY on YouTube!

And YouTube says there are a BILLION videos viewed every single day on their site.

Those are some BIG numbers!

If I get just a tiny percentage of the traffic flowing through YouTube it could result in thousands of new DD subscribers.

And the best part is, I could get those subscribers for FREE!

So here’s my plan inspired by Terry Dean’s newsletter:

I’m calling it…

The YouTube 30-Day Challenge

Here’s how it will work…

Every day for 30 days, I’ll post a new Doberman Dan video on YouTube. I’ll also embed the YouTube link in a blog post on this site.

The purpose is to see how much traffic and how many new subscribers I can generate in 30 days from this plan.

I’m also curious to see how this affects my rankings in Google.

Sounds easy enough, right?

The only challenge may be coming up with something interesting and relevant to say every day. I’m hoping the 20+ years of entrepreneurial and direct response lessons stored in my gray matter will flow out easily.

I planned on starting this as soon as I finished my Kitchen Table Business coaching group in April… but plans change sometimes, don’t they?

Turns out, I need to start it ASAP… unless I want to mime my way through the videos.

See, I’ve been traveling all over the place the past couple weeks seeing different specialists trying to find an answer I liked. Unfortunately, they all seem to agree on the answer I DON’T like.

Here’s the Reader’s Digest version:

The experts and all their fancy machines say there is this thing growing pretty rapidly in my neck that’s not supposed to be there. And the damn thing is causing some issues with my airway.

Now apparently a blocked airway can have some side effects… one being…

An almost immediate death!

Having seen a few people “choked out” in my day, I can attest to the fact that the effects of a blocked airway are pretty immediate and dramatic.

So old Doc Sawbones and crew want to hack open my neck and start pulling stuff outta there.

It would be great if they could just pull the bad stuff out… but it’s all mixed up with some good stuff… VITAL stuff that needs to come out, too.

One of those “vital” things… or at least I consider it to be vital… is my vocal nerve. That’s the nerve that allows you to speak.

Now some people will be happy to hear this… (now that I think of it, maybe a LOT of people)… but Doc Sawbones says it’s possible my vocal nerve is going to get beat up really bad or possibly severed.

That means the ability to sing and shout are gone forever… as is my ability to speak normally.

He started going off about more surgery that could be done to move one of my vocal cords over so I could at least have a breathy Clint Eastwood kind of voice, yadda yadda, yadda… but my eyes just glazed over at that point and I got lost in my own thoughts.

I was never a great lead singer…. but I did really well on harmony parts and background vocals, if I do say so myself. It got me a lot of good gigs. A guitarist who can sing is more sought after than just a guitarist.

And most importantly, I LOVE to sing.

I think I was more upset about possibly losing the ability to sing than I was about losing the ability to speak.

One of my best friends was told he has stage 4 cancer and 5 months to live… five years ago. So I know doctors aren’t always right. But I also believe in being prepared for the worst.

If you prepare for the worst and it doesn’t happen, you’re really not out anything. But…

If you DON’T prepare for the worst and it DOES happen…
you’re probably screwed.

(HUGE life and business lesson there you should probably heed.)

So I’m going forward with my YouTube 30-day challenge ASAP.

I’m also using and enjoying my voice as much as I can right now.

Stuff I’d normally handle by e-mail, I’m doing it over the phone.

Yesterday, instead of doing copy critiques for my proteges via e-mail, I recorded them on MP3s and e-mailed them the recording.

I’ve been working on a CD of original music and had planned on doing a couple vocal tunes on it. I’m going to try to belt those out soon.

I’m expecting the best… but planning for the worst.

Life can really throw some curve balls, huh?

There is only one correct response…

Dust yourself off, step back up to the plate… and…

Keep Swinging!

I’m amazed at the petty stupid little stuff some people allow themselves to be defeated by.

Look, whatever problem or challenge you’re using as an excuse to give up and quit… there is always somebody with a challenge 1,000 times worse using it as a reason to keep fighting.

I may sound like a broken record but that’s because a LOT of people need to hear it:

As long as there’s breath in your lungs…
the game ain’t over.

Quit making excuses and get back up to the plate to take another swing.

Simple philosophy, I know… but it has served me EXTREMELY well.

And it will serve you very well, too.

I guarantee it.

All the best,

Tuesday, 6:33 AM

Dear Friend,

Last week I sent a message endorsing Ben Settle’s new hard copy newsletter.

Since I know that negative news always gets more viewership than positive news, I split-tested two “negative” headlines on one of my subscriber lists.

They were…

1. Ben Settle SUCKS (By the way, it was Ben who suggested this.)

    

    

2. Why I HATE Ben Settle

Here’s a screen shot from my Aweber account with the results:

Notice that the headline “Why I HATE Ben Settle” got a 37.2% open rate and a 18.8% click-through rate.

The headline “Ben Settle SUCKS” got a higher open rate, 44.6%… but a lower click-through rate, 12.8%.

I have no idea how many sales it brought in because the link in the e-mail was not an affiliate link. It just linked directly to Ben’s newsletter site. (I believe so strongly in Ben’s new newsletter I endorsed it without any compensation.)

Looking back, we SHOULD have used a tracking link from Ben’s 1shoppingcart account so we could see how many new subscribers he got from this endorsement.

Oh well.

Anyhoo… would you like to know why one headline got a higher open rate but the other got a higher click-through rate?

So would I.

The truth is… I have no earthly idea.

We can guess why we THINK it got these results, pontificating for hours… but the truth is, we don’t really know why. The only thing we know for sure is the results.

And why do we know the results?

Because I TESTED it.

You can theorize for days and try to rationalize why you think this or that headline is better… but in the end, you’re just guessing.

The only way to know for sure is to run that puppy up the flagpole and see how many people salute it.

And it’s so easy to test this stuff online nowadays there’s no excuse for not doing it.

All the best,

P.S. If I were sending a direct mail pitch and had access to a list of customers or subscribers like this… this is EXACTLY what I would do to figure out the best headline for my direct mail piece.

If I didn’t have access to a list I would do a headline split test on Google Adwords.

It’s a lot cheaper and faster to split test your headlines this way than in direct mail.